[Creative Muses] Response
Apr. 19th, 2007 07:29 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
his_sarah_janeWhat do you regret the most?
Sarah Jane never considered herself one for regrets. It was always a matter of living life in the moment, never bothering to wonder how the past could be different or how the tiniest thing would change events. Maybe that was part of being a time traveller. If you thought too much about it, as she certainly learned from experience, it made your head spin. Even before that, she had always preferred living each day as it came without much room for regrets. Regrets were like clichés to her: absolutely pointless when you got to the underlined meaning.
And then, after nearly thirty years, the Doctor just waltzed right back into her life with that goofy smile of his. And all the regrets Sarah Jane didn’t believe in suddenly came rushing back.
She regretted not telling him that she loved him.
She regretted never acting on her feelings.
She regretted wasting so much of her life after Abredeen waiting for him.
She regretted never moving on.
She regretted not valuing each day spent travelling more.
She regretted never trying to follow all those leads she had accumulated over the years of cases that may – no, probably – had involved him.
Perhaps, even more than anything, Sarah Jane had regretted the lack of a proper goodbye. Because deep down in her heart, she always thought he would come back. Even as the minutes turned into hours turned into days turned into years. But he never did and she never got to really tell him goodbye.
It wouldn’t be like that this time. No. This would be the last time Sarah Jane decided to let herself feel anything remotely like regret ever again.
Sarah Jane never considered herself one for regrets. It was always a matter of living life in the moment, never bothering to wonder how the past could be different or how the tiniest thing would change events. Maybe that was part of being a time traveller. If you thought too much about it, as she certainly learned from experience, it made your head spin. Even before that, she had always preferred living each day as it came without much room for regrets. Regrets were like clichés to her: absolutely pointless when you got to the underlined meaning.
And then, after nearly thirty years, the Doctor just waltzed right back into her life with that goofy smile of his. And all the regrets Sarah Jane didn’t believe in suddenly came rushing back.
She regretted not telling him that she loved him.
She regretted never acting on her feelings.
She regretted wasting so much of her life after Abredeen waiting for him.
She regretted never moving on.
She regretted not valuing each day spent travelling more.
She regretted never trying to follow all those leads she had accumulated over the years of cases that may – no, probably – had involved him.
Perhaps, even more than anything, Sarah Jane had regretted the lack of a proper goodbye. Because deep down in her heart, she always thought he would come back. Even as the minutes turned into hours turned into days turned into years. But he never did and she never got to really tell him goodbye.
It wouldn’t be like that this time. No. This would be the last time Sarah Jane decided to let herself feel anything remotely like regret ever again.
